Power in Feelings
It is easy to get caught up and generalize our feelings in today's environment. Sometimes we cannot find the right words to describe our situation, and sometimes we just feel the same. We can often identify if we are experiencing a negative or positive emotion, but the specific feeling gets lost in our thoughts. For example, I have clients come into my office, and when asked how they feel this week, I usually get a response like, "well, this week was bad." It is easy for us to be engulfed in these emotions when we cannot correctly identify the emotion we are feeling or when the emotion changes. Enter the feelings wheel.
The Feelings Wheel was created by Dr. Gloria Wilcox to help differentiate and identify different sensations and feelings we are experiencing. By identifying and naming our specific emotions, we can better understand ourselves and our situation. This can lead us to determine our unmet needs and help us decide what the next step can be for ourselves or our family.
The feelings wheel is separated into three layers: Primary, Secondary, and Tertiary emotions. In the first layer, lie the primary emotions: Happy, Sad, Disgusted, Angry, Fearful, Bad, and Surprised. These feelings then split into more specific emotions designed to help us identify exactly what we are feeling and map how our feelings feed into each other.
By being aware about what emotions we are experiencing and when, we are able to better understand ourselves and improve our mood. As part of positive psychology, it is essential to not only identify our negative emotions, but our positive ones as well. By naming when our emotions and feelings change, we can improve our mindset by recognizing that we are not experiencing negative emotions all the time.
So what does this look like in our everyday lives? Here are a few ideas on how to use the feelings wheel.
1. Journaling
By journaling our mood every hour, for example, we are able to practice identifying what our emotion is, when it changes, and be mindful of the different feelings we are experiencing. This allows us to stop overgeneralizing our negative emotions and work towards a positive mindset.
2. Practice
Adding the feelings wheel to conversations can look like asking our teens or kids what they felt today during different activities. By bringing our feelings to the forefront of our experience, we can also normalize experiencing an unfamiliar emotion and not our go-to answer.
3. Before a Crisis
By using the feelings wheel to identify our sensations and emotions, we can recognize them before they become an issue. Normalizing the conversation and using the feelings wheel to name out emotions in a one-on-one conversation also allows us to empathize and be more intentional with our feelings and emotions.
This may feel out of our comfort zone while implementing, but once implemented, there is so much freedom in our ability to identify what we are experiencing. Having the language to identify and explain to others allows us to have a deeper connection. How will you try using the feelings wheel?