On Raising Teens and Adolescents
The tween and adolescent years are an odd mix of equal parts bittersweet emotions and watchful anticipation, as we watch our children grow and flourish and begin to spread their wings. Future independence is looming on the horizon, and that horizon is faster approaching as each of these turbulent years passes. As parents we cling so desperately to the memories of when they were little, when they would follow us around, sit in our laps, and shower us with countless kisses and hugs. As much as we tell ourselves that we want for them to be independent, to reach their potential, to reach their dreams, it’s actually hard, very hard in fact, to let go as they grow. In some ways we feel pangs of grief; bit by bit the days of having to do everything for our young ones fade away. And of course there’s no more Barbie dolls, no more Thomas the Train, no more PBS Kids, and the list goes on.
The Transition into the Tween Years
The transition into the tween years and next into full-blown adolescence is an emotionally-wrenching one, but approaching this years long progression with tolerance, warmth, empathy, nurturing, and plenty of humor can help. Likewise, given that the world has more than enough negativity to go round, encouraging our kids to utilize positive self-talk along the way is important as well.
Questions for Teens
Lastly, when things feel tricky and tough, teach them to ask themselves, “What progress can I celebrate?”, “I’m proud I tried; that took courage,” “What can I learn from this situation?”, “What boundaries do I need to set for myself?”, “How can I be a true friend?”, and “How can I take on this challenge on like an adventure?” Reassure them that it’s okay to acknowledge and feel their feelings, that you believe in them wholeheartedly, and that you will always be their safe place to land in the moments that they need it.
How The Mind Spot Can Help
Raising tweens, teens and adolescents can be tricky and emotional for parents. The Mind Spot can offer parenting consultations and family counseling to make these transitions easier. Make an appointment with Dr. Allison Hamff or one of our counselors today. Meet Our Counselors